‘Don’t compare yourself to anybody in this world; if you do so, you are insulting yourself ~ Bill Gates.’
“I have been building my ‘house’ for the longest time ever, and finally, it’s finished. I take a few steps back and admire it. I can’t help but smile. Then I make the huge mistake of turning to my side, and I see my friend also admiring his ‘house’; but his is a mansion. A beautiful mansion. And big too. Mine is just a bungalow. A little tiny bungalow. When I turn back to look at my ‘house’ for the second time, it’s not so beautiful anymore; too basic, too cheap, too ugly, too <insert everything negative>. “
What is your ‘house’? Is it your job? School? Goals / dreams? Spirituality? You as a person? Let’s talk about that a little bit; now, shall we?
‘Comparison is the thief of all joy ~ Franklin Roosevelt’.
1. YOUR JOURNEY.
‘Don’t compare your beginning to someone else’s middle ~ Jon Acuff’.
Our stories are all different. Even in the pursuit of our goals / dreams / ambitions, we find ourselves in different circumstances, having access to different resources (in terms of quality and quantity), born with different abilities, having been assigned different duties/tasks to accomplish and all that. That being said, even though two people may be chasing after the same thing, (and, sometimes, even began to do so at the same time), their success stories will be different. Even though others may get to their peaks earlier than you, it doesn’t make you a failure. Just do your grind. Different person, different story. That’s okay. You’ll get there.
Don’t compare your life to others. You are not them. YOU ARE YOU. We only get to see the highlights of other people’s lives, so, don’t waste time wishing to be them, because you honestly never really know what skeletons they hide in their closets. Just love you.
Honestly, sometimes I wish we didn’t have social media. Yes! I said it, ( which is funny because I am actually on a number of them..haha! ) but that’s exactly why and where I am deriving my point from. Nowadays, social media is like a race or competition, and everybody is quick to showcase all that they have going on for them. It just makes me wonder, when do we have the time to actually live? There’s more to life. How about you put the phone down for an hour and enjoy that moment with your family, friends, husband/wife. DO MORE THAN JUST EXIST; START LIVING!!!
2. YOUR BEAUTY.
One thing that I find very interesting is how hard it is for people to complement each other nowadays. I honestly don’t know what happened to the good old kind of vulnerability, where you could openly tell a person that you liked something about them, or you liked something they had on, or just appreciate them for their good work. After all, although we are all different and unique, we can all relate to each other on the basic fact that we are all human beings. Being nice to a person doesn’t make you less of a person. If anything, it makes you even more of a person.
As I said earlier, everything seems to be a competition, but why? Just because someone is beautiful / handsome, doesn’t make you less beautiful / less handsome. Stop looking at people and comparing all your flaws and/or insecurities to all the physical attributes that you like/admire about them. You are beautiful too, but if you don’t see it, nobody will.
The beast from the story ‘Beauty and the beast’ was lucky enough to find a girl who calmed the beast in him and brought out the prince in him. Likewise, you have to find the ‘prince/princess’ in you, and bring him/her out. Don’t wait for someone else to do it when you can easily do so by loving who you are. Most importantly, don’t use other people as a measuring scale, because, as I said, you have no idea what skeletons they hide in their closet. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. YOU ARE HANDSOME. God Himself says so, and you therefore have no reason to doubt it.
3. YOUR SPIRITUALITY.
Every single moment, we have so much to be grateful for, but we fail to see it because we spend so much time looking at others and taking note of what we don’t have. Learn to be thankful to God. Something as basic as life, food, water, is such a huge gift. Don’t take anything for granted. Rather than complaining about how your siblings/parents piss you off, treasure them, because you have them. Take time to appreciate your best-friend. Be thankful and let God know how grateful you are for your life, because every single minute is a gift.
We have a little control of what happens in our life, but the bigger part is in God’s hands. Stop trying so hard to be a certain way because of what you are seeing on the internet or hearing from your friends. That isn’t what God wants for you. Let go of the steering wheel and let God lead you instead. Focus on God and you won’t waste your time using others as a measuring scale in different aspects of your life. Fix your eyes on Him, and you will be much happier.
God has a beautiful story written for you, but for it to come into play, you have to invest yourself fully in it too. It’s YOUR story, so it’s about YOU; not about THEM/HIM/HER. Let God make you and shape you into the perfect pot, and be patient. Let Him do so at the right time. Sometimes it may hurt, it may seem hopeless, it may feel worthless, but don’t worry. Just hold on, because, God is the potter, and this potter knows exactly what He is doing. TRUST THE PROCESS.
As you pursue different aspects of your life, people will react differently. Some people will encourage you and push you towards your dreams; others will make it their mission to destroy them before your very eyes (..only if you let them though). Truth is, none of them matter. The only thing that truly counts is who you see when you look into that mirror in-front of you. If you see a samurai, then you’re good to go! BELIEVE IN YOURSELF.
I have talked severally about loving and accepting who you are, flaws and all. You are not and will never be perfect. Learn to love you, just as you are, because that is exactly who you were made to be. See the good in you and bring it out. The moment you are satisfied with who you are and love yourself, you will be much happier. Stop seeking love from other people before you can even give it to yourself.
There will always be someone <insert any adjective..literally> -er than you, and that is exactly why you have to stop comparing yourself to others. You are perfectly imperfect, and all your flaws, failures, heartbreaks, mess-ups, all of it contributes to who you are. As people like to say, your only competition should be the person that you were yesterday.
Yeap! It’s cliché, but it’s only right that I conclude this by saying:
JUST BE YOU!
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Have a lovely week ahead ! 🙂